My Tummy Isn't Flat!! | Bindu Unnikrishnan

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My Tummy Isn't Flat!!
by Bindu Unnikrishnan

"Unapologetically true!"
Such was my response to an insensitive comment from a shallow, self-centered person. In fact, it wasn't just one person but a herd of self-obsessed women who undermine others, body shame them, and revel inside a bubble inflated by their egos and false self-images of perfection. Ironically, they are far from perfect. Their so-called perfection comes at a steep price. Some even remain childless just to keep their bodies unaffected by pregnancy, striving to maintain a flat tummy as if it were the ultimate sign of health.

Just the other day, I praised a lady in her 50s. She was exuberant, a happy soul who wore a skirt and top with pride, showing off her outfit like a precious gift. And indeed, it was—a gift from her daughter-in-law. Her joy was contagious, her charm radiant. I complimented her generously, every word sincere. She was resplendent in that attire, her inner beauty shining through. Then, a so-called friend who had witnessed our interaction commented, "How fat she looked in that dress. Maybe she weighed a hundred kgs." I was shocked, rendered speechless by such brutal body shaming. I wanted to tell her that, though a little plump, that lady looked a million times more beautiful with her grace and elegance than the rude and insensitive person standing next to me. When did thinness become a merit if it was accompanied by such rudeness and cruelty?

For me, true beauty is in the smile on one's face and the charm they exude. It’s never about curves, complexion, the sheen of hair, or a narrow waist. True beauty lies in intellect, knowledge, compassion, the way someone carries themselves, and the positive impact they have on others. I hold high standards when it comes to beauty, standards that cannot be diluted by any external influence.

The second blow was even more unrealistic. This woman claimed she looked younger because of her petite body and well-maintained figure, boasting that people often told her she looked hot and could carry off any dress because she was thin. Honestly, she was 47. Every inch of her body, from her grey hair—covered in global color with blonde streaks—to her toes, screamed her age. When was looking younger considered a beauty parameter? Or do we still carry a wrong perception that someone looking thin is young and someone carrying extra fat at the tummy is old? Thanks to the invention of hair color that would have otherwise screamed the world of our age!

I remember another incident at a family gathering. My sister, who had always been slim, was praised endlessly for her appearance. She basked in the compliments, while I, with my post-pregnancy body, was met with pitying looks and unsolicited advice on dieting and exercise. One relative even asked, "When do you plan to get back in shape?" I laughed it off, but inside, I felt a sting. What they didn’t see was the joy of motherhood, the sleepless nights, the endless love, and the strength it took to balance work and family.

Another unforgettable moment happened at a high school reunion. It was a joyful event where old friends caught up on years gone by. Amid the laughter and nostalgia, one former classmate, who had become a fitness coach, commented on how "well-preserved" another classmate looked because of her flat tummy and lean physique. As the evening wore on, I found myself in a conversation with this fitness coach. She asked me, almost with a hint of pity, "So, what happened? You used to be so fit in school." I could have listed the myriad experiences that shaped me, from the joys and challenges of parenthood to the rigors of building a career, but instead, I simply said, "Life happened, and I'm proud of every moment."

To the women who believe a flat tummy is the pinnacle of beauty, I say this: beauty is not a number on a scale or a reflection in a mirror. It is the light in your eyes, the warmth in your smile, the kindness in your heart, and the wisdom in your mind. It is the strength to lift others up rather than tearing them down. It is the courage to embrace oneself unapologetically and to live true to one's essence. A flat tummy might be a physical attribute, but a beautiful soul is an eternal one.

Beauty is a tightly woven fabric of life experiences, laughter shared with loved ones, and tears shed in moments of vulnerability. It's in the strength we show in the face of adversity and the love we give without expecting anything in return. It's the memories etched in the lines of our faces and the stories our bodies tell. A flat tummy may seem desirable, but it pales in comparison to the richness of stretch marks and loose hanging skin after the birth of my beautiful child. It is a sign of a life lived fully and authentically.

So to the world that equates thinness with beauty, let us rewrite the narrative. Let us celebrate the diversity of bodies and the stories they carry. Let us find beauty in the imperfect, the real, the true.

Beauty is in the laugh lines shared,
In the wrinkles time has dared,
In the eyes that shine with grace,
In the soul's warm, tender embrace.

So let the world with narrow sight,
See beauty in the shallow light,
For we who know where true worth lies,
Embrace our hearts, our souls, our ties.

For beauty’s not a flat, cold line,
But curves of life, a love divine.
In every shape, a woman will glow.
Shower her with love and compliments,
Like a diamond, she will sparkle and glow.

About the Author

Bindu Unnikrishnan is a poet who has gained recognition for her evocative and insightful poetry. Her works often explore themes of diversity, unity, and women's empowerment. One of her notable poems, "Chain Up Not, Woman!," reflects on the societal constraints faced by women and advocates for their liberation and self-expression. She is a teacher by profession, but a writer by passion. She has worked in over 50 anthologies as a co-author and also released her solo poetry book titled ‘ My treasure trove of emotions ‘ recently. In addition to her poetry, Bindu Unnikrishnan has also made a mark in the beauty pageant circuit, winning the title of Mrs. Maharashtra 2023 in the Elite category, along with two sub-titles: Mrs. Beauty with Purpose and Mrs. Confident. She was also first runner up in Eduqueen- beauty with brain. Her achievements in both literary and pageant spheres highlight her multifaceted talents and commitment to promoting meaningful causes.